To some people
the pain of separation or being alone by themselves is at such a level that
almost like a natural reflex action they go into a state of self-inflicted
emotional confinement to avoid the pain. They would stop being “Social”, stop
making new friends even. For these and many more severe outcomes, it is always
prudent to take the step as slowly as possible; take your time step back from
the situation, while keeping your thought process as logical as possible. No
matter how rich and affluent we become the bottom line is we (as social
animals) need each other to hang around on planet earth. Even the priciest of
things won’t make you happy on their own unless you have someone to share them
with. Aint it!
Despite being
and ardent opponent of using “rules of thumb” for socio-emotional life
management, my first guide post to all friends (even those not friends) coming
to me for advice is to put the relationship on probation (of course unless you are dating a juvenile convict or a
court). I hope I don’t sound remarkably corporate there! But let me explain.
We all would
agree that everyone puts a lot of time and effort to seize a relationship, but
when it comes to ending one, the process is always hasty. How can you let a
blunt exchange of arguments and few harsh words have a more powerful impact
than hundreds of cherished moments that you had together. If it is possible to
bearably put the relationship at a halt for a while without an official
break-up sign board on the door. Try that for a while.
There is one
watch point to this tough. You have to be careful not to fall a victim to your
own weakness, prejudice or biases. It might sound absurd, but outside the
realms of Normal need of belongingness there is quite a few of us women who are
addicted to being in a relationship and can’t think of a life without a man
around. I call it the emotional parasite state (will elaborate on it some other
time). Then there are the ones who are more of loners even when In a
relationship and whom dread going the extra mile to find a new guy because they
hate socializing.
If you want to
continue being in a relationship for just the heck of being in a relationship
then you can go on, and nobody would stop you (not before you declare emotional
or financial bankruptcy). If it is the fear of moving on or any other inherent
weaknesses and biases, it’s clear that you recognized those in time, and it is
better if you stop trend its best
that you are trying to learn how
to get your ex-boyfriend back. However if it’s a genuine reason for which
you want the relationship to continue then it is quite possible that you can get you ex-boyfriend back in no time if
you give your angry, irritated mind some rest and use that time productively to
find out a plausible solution to your problems and the question how to get my boyfriend back.
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